Trauma

“Trauma always leaves a scar. It follows us home, it changes our lives. Trauma messes everybody up. But, maybe that’s the point. All the pain and the fear and the crap. maybe going through all that is what keeps us moving forward. It’s what pushes us. Maybe we have to get a little messed up. Before we can step up”

In life, there will always be trauma cases. Sometimes, it can be so traumatic that it changes us 180degrees and it leaves scars. Reminding us that it was there, it will always be there. We feel the pain – the phantom pain, feeling all over again the sinking feeling of fear. And no matter how much we want not to be reminded by it, we know that deep inside, trauma is what needed for us to move forward. Running away from it will only allow it to haunt us every once in a while. To grow healthily is to embrace the past, the trauma, and to believe that we can survive the next big trauma.

My scars, I have many to show. But there is this particular one, I seem to be stuck with it, can’t seem to move forward from it. Sometimes, I feel I can’t breathe it and other days, I feel I can’t survive without it. It is always there.

I tried to overcome it, to face it or avoid it, but like a weak recovering addict, I fell back to it over and over again.

I can’t let go of it. Some parts of me don’t want to let go it. It was after all, the first time, I opened myself to it. You see, I’m a quiet person by nature. I don’t easily warm up to people or trust them. I don’t know why but I fear to allow them into my life, let them see the real me and fear that they will be disappointed of the real me and abandon me. But it makes such an impression on me, made me drawn to it. I was happy being with it. But it didn’t last long. Everyone has their own flaws and insecurities. And its flaws and insecurities reflected on mine. In the end, both of us got hurt and scars were formed. I am still suffering from the pain it caused me.

Now, I am carrying both the “happy times” and the scars. It was like…when love and hate collides. As much as I hate to admit it, I am still emotionally attached to it but for it, it is a different story already. I am really not the type that can let go of something I’m emotionally attached to it. I’m not strong that way. But I realized today, what I lost; I can never get it back…not for me. The scars were there to remind me of the hurts and that it can still hurts me in the future.

Part of moving forward is to realize that you need to move forward, and only you yourself must make the first step forward and never look back

I’m not sure why it always goes downhill
Like a broken cistern, never could stay filled
I’ve spent 10 years singing the gravity away
But the water keeps on falling from the sky

Here tonight while the stars are blacking out
With every hopes and dreams I ever had are in doubts
I’ve spent 10 years trying to sing these doubts away
But the water keeps on falling from the eyes

And heaven knows, heaven knows
I tried to find the cure for the pain
Oh my Lord, to suffer like You do
It will be a lie to run away

(Jon Foreman – Cure for Pain)

The Reality of Blogosphere

It has been a long time since I last blogged abt something. I know it has always been on-off affairs, I guess not many things that can keep me interested for long and blogging is one of them. I may be able justified why I “disappeared” after taking the trouble to migrate to WordPress and announce/brag about it etc… with the reason that I went through a life-changing experience not long after. That will be another post…someday.

I still follow blogs even though the numbers been dwindling. Either the blogger quit or I am too tired of reading some blogger’s incessant postings of their actually very mundane life. I was just thinking in one of my bouts of insomnia…when I was thinking of blogging again. Why do people blog and why blogs remained popular as ever?

One of my theories is that since we were young and for those who were exposed to western literatures, writing diaries is common thing in childhood esp. girls. Diaries with pink, fluffy covers, or those with cute little locks…erm, I don’t know if boys keep diaries.nvm. So we are taught to pen-in our little thoughts, vent-out our angers and frustration, doodles over n over about our crushes etc. And it is always a secret thing, known only to selected few. And now as we are all grown up, many people think that blogging is like writing diary or life journal. But how many of us actually transform our “diary mentality” into blogs and wouldn’t it be freaking to let millions of people having access to your diary? Kinda. And are we prepared to let our inner thoughts in the open and mostly likely, judged by strangers? Kinda. As I’m writing this, I’m already wondering what will ppl think about this post and if there aren’t any comments, I will feel that my inner thoughts has been taken as rubbish. Anyway, I haven’t really come across diary or life-journaling blogs that is palatable to read (some really need therapy) except Minishorts. I always enjoy reading her blog – she is direct with her feelings and she can really rant and “taruh” her friends, colleagues and church people when they should deserved to be. She has balls..so to speak. And it is all true account and I can easily feel it whatever she is going through. (I’m not self-promoting myself as a blog-critic so I’ll just keep my critics on blogs simple, okie dokie)

Another theory is that we are quite “full” of ourselves and we are busybodies. So what do we get? Blogs. Many many blogs devoted to the exciting, adrenaline-pumping lives of people (note the sarcasm tone here) Kenny Sia blogged almost about every single thing that happen in his life e.g. his screwed-up fan interview with Chelsea football club to his sleep-driving accident. Man, he can even pose happily in front of his damaged car being towed out. Timothy Tiah blogged about his hotel room in Manila, about how busy he is until he almost forgot to wipe his ass. Lilian Chan blogged about how lazy she is in the morning, whatever her kids did or said, about how much money she earned by blogging etc. Note that all those mentioned are Malaysian femes bloggers… and not surprising, there are always a lot comments that followed after each fantastic account of their life’s events. Blogs are the cheaper or almost free version of tabloids magazine. It is not that we like to read about celebrities and their life outside studios. We just like to read about people – what they did, what they bought, what they eat… just about anything. Why not just asking them? No…it is more interesting reading about it. And everyone wants to be a celebrity…just that they are also the paparazzi, the tabloids reporters.

And of course the “peer pressure” factor that drive people into blogging. When I said peer pressure, I also meant politicians (except Chedet) It is fun to blog and read blogs about some incidents, events, crazy-parties or trips among a group of friends. There is the race of who post first or be the first commenter or sharing photos around esp. the embarrassing kinds. But these types of blogs generally die fast and nowadays, quite seldom to be found… thanks to Facebook. One thing I don’t get esp. in Malaysian politic scene is the sudden mushrooming of politicians’ blogs after March 2008 general election. First of all, they have been advocating the banning of blogs and calling bloggers stupid, busybodies or jobless bum. But after the Opposition swept a lot of votes of rakyat with the help from blogs (we, the bloggers like to think of it btw), almost every politicians been blogging. But they didn’t realize that one of the reasons why they lost is that many times they never use their head to think before proposing their ideas. Common people can do that. Representatives of the rakyat should never. Don’t be cheapskate…go and hire a PR or a spin-doctor instead of, a webmaster and office boy to type out your thoughts, ideas, plans, whatever and click “Post”. Why Chedet is so damn popular? because he gives logical and I hope, truthful insights of the Malaysia and the world politics scenes. He educates common people of what should and should not be done. RantingsMM…she advocates for the unfortunate people. Yeah, she is from high-social background but she is going all out to help and to show ignorant people like us what the ‘real deal’ outside our bubble is.

Hmmm…that is just my thoughts. It would seem hypocritical as I am blogging too. But the first commandment of blogging stated, “It is your blog, so blog whatever you want” We have our own moral consciousness, our own mind and our styles…so mine will be, well, just my thoughts.

Reasons I blog today…

A little excerpt from 5xmom’s blog which I find it so true…

You know your blog is getting lame….when you start to copy and paste
email forwards, post Youtube videos, copy and paste technology and gadgets
stuffs eventhough thousands have blogged it, write something extreme and hope
someone notices or…. when you need to go and find meme that no one tags you and do it anyway.

And OMG….my blog is getting lame. Even I feel my life is so boring that the reason i blog today because I have nothing better to do! Sigh….I need some “beats” in my life. I need Scofield (that super-cute Prison Break guy), I need a change of environment and I need something something la.

When alot of my friends seem to be busy with the concert, I’m not. Not even abit enthu about it…actually hoping for it to be over soon. One reason is that I’m not doing anything for it (kinda left-out) and another reason is that I have no tickets to give my other friends. Even I dont have a ticket myself. Now that annoyed me! Hmmph.

The blog for the CF is done and open to all. I feel sad actually…I enjoyed doin it (eventhou I sucked at website designing) but hey, that is just me. I’m the type of person who enjoy the process, the journey not the result, the destination. Yeah. everytime I logged into the admin page, I think to myself…Now what? [I'm the type who enjoy playing Simcity cuz I enjoy building the city and then...creating many many natural disasters for the city.....Muahahaha] I dont know…let see how la. Hey, I promise I wont coincidentally accidentally wreck the blog, k.

Any more reason I blog today…? hmm, I cant wait to go back now to attend my aunty’s 60th birthday bash. I dont know what kind of bash it will be but when my mum smsed n told me she is learning line-dancing for the bash….that is interesting. Hahaha. That is something i gotto see for myself. No way I’m goin to miss that even if I have to cram for my exam with my cycles.

sigh….i think i shud start thinking of activities to do, if not I’ll die of boredom soon.

Ta-Ta…I’m goin to wreck other ppl’s lives now.

Simply….

Simply …. because I want to blog. Random thoughts. First of all, I’m bored. BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED!

Yeah, u get that message loud and clear. CF Concert coming up. For those who r wondering….dun worry, I’m not singin or involve in the worship team. I guess my ‘tone-deaf’ inability have something to do with it. Hey, I’m not being disgruntled here ok. I fit better behind the scene than right up onstage. But I’m feeling I dont really like to do all the donkey works just because of my inability.

Again….BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED!

This post is boring. I post simply because I want to blog.

A Rambler Rambling

Today is a good day to ramble around. I have alot things to think, alot of things I duwan to think about and alot of things I am forced to think about. I dun have an exact header, points to say or something intelligent to write. Keeping quiet is maybe the wisest thing to do but I want to ramble.

I dunno how some people can always come up with something intelligent around the usual LIFE,WORLD, GOD, PEOPLE. FEELING words. Take for example, Grey’s Anatomy – every episode opened with someone saying something that sometimes, hit ur head n u have to utter “wow, that is so true!”. Of cuz they(the script writers) r professional. But I wondered what kind of mind or life they have to think of such things??? Actually, it is just for fleeting moment…I dun really care.

I did a spiritual gift test recently. It is a test to assess how well do u know urself or “ur gifts”. No, not ur talents. Dun understand? Then google it…I think they will give u some free online tests n bible verses from Book of Corinthian. Surprisingly, I scored very high on “PERCEPTION” or “DISCERNMENT”. My friend told me that my pastor’s wife told her a day before the Bible study I have that gift. I dont know exactly wat it mean but I was told I can “see people”. Not the I-can-see-them-SixthSense-type. But I can perceived a person’s action n his/her thots pretty well. I dun think it mean I can read people’s minds. Tat will be pretty scary huh….for u n for me.

Is it true? Maybe. Maybe not. Who know such things? Well, I think I do have it lor. But I think everybody can…if they just take away all those mind-numbing social niceties from their system. N think of humans nothing but selfish, self-absorbed and competitive. We r tuned into this system…believe it or not. Since when we really care if one of our friend is sick? We say things like ‘hope u’ll get better’ to the person who been whining about her headache because we shud be nice. U r not really interested in her headache. N she not is not really interested to want to tok to u about it. She wants ur attention, the feeling that her friend care about her, someone in the world care about her headache. N you say those meaningless, insincere, overly-used courteous phrases so u n the other person can move on with life.
…Yah if u take it all out, u can perceived anyone’s thots very well. So is it a gift or a curse? Because I dont really see the good points for it. It will eventually lead to the truth about people and bittered with the world.

My life seem to be constantly governed. By money, parents, friends, God and society. I keep on saying I dun give a damn…but I am forced to. If there is option out of this, I will really want to take it but at the same time, I will hesistate. I dunno why. I am rambling remember. Sometimes, right now with everything I said, I posted…What am I?

By the looks of it, I cant say I’m…

• a Christian cuz I dun feel the love~
• a human cuz I feel I’m a misanthropic
• a good friend cuz if my friend told me so….then?

Do I really care? Probably I will just shove it under the carpet till something something kua.

My F1 Predicament

sigh…..you know, normally I will be very excited during the month of March. Cuz I will get to watch my one and only favourite sport on tv, internet and be the 1st one to tear the sports section fortnightly. Yeap…I am talking about FORMULA ONE. The opening race of the season happens every March.

Eventhou I dont get to watch it eversince I came to Russia…I’m still a diehard fan. Yeah, I used to booked the tv every two Sundays from 7.oopm till 10.oopm. In the morning, the sports section will be mysteriously disappeared. On Monday, my poor frens have to hear me yakking about the race esp when my man won.

N guess wat, whether or not my frens watch or like to watch F1, all of them knew who is my man n my team. Hehe….I taught them well to remember this:

KIMI RAIKKONEN McLAREN MERCEDES TEAM

And I’m against Michael Schumacher and his Ferrari team. They are my enemies. Those who support them are my enemies. Not the aggresive kinds la…..

So this 2007 season…Shumy decided he is old edi and retired. Fine with me. Dun care.
But AAARrrghHhh…guess which driver the Ferrari decided to replace Shumy????!!!!!??

It’s my man. He become a Ferrari driver!!!!! He left McLaren n become a Ferrari guy.

WHY!? Why?! Why?!

He become this…….
sigh….do anyone understand my predicament?? Is like in football world…u r a diehard Arsenal n Thierry Henry fan whole life…n suddenly that he go n join M.United! U can support Arsenal n MU new guy Henry rite? I CANT SUPPORT MCLAREN N FERRARI at the same time la. Haiyoh…..

My LifeLog_, Rantrantrant_

My Anguish as a Malaysian

It has been the longest and most tiring weekend for me. N this is a lesson for me – never ever try to finish my big assignment last minute. I had 2 months to do it and didnt do it. Finally, when the deadline came and that was last Friday, I tried to be a hero and started it a day before the deadline. N of course, I couldnt finish it on time and have to pursue my groupmate to pass it up together tomorrow.
*finger crossed, everything will be ok*

Alot of thoughts came into my mind this weekend while doing. Well, I couldnt concentrate on my assignment 24-7 and have to surf the net and relax my mind. So-called ‘relax my mind’.

Everyday, I read about the big-shot idiots of Malaysia government giving out the stupidest ideas ever in this universe. Ok…fine, Malaysia planned to send someone up to space. Finally they chose 2 people out of the batch of candidates (not suprisingly one of which is a Malay…i’m not racist, I’m just statin the obvious choice) and these 2 guys went to Russia for training bla bla bla. N guess wat, Malaysia planned to send Malaysian to the space….to play batu-seremban(tradisional game with stones) and drink teh-tarik(popular Malaysia’s tea)!!!!

Wow!!! If they pulled it off…it will be THE GREATEST LAUGHING STOCK of THE CENTURY! The whole 1st world will be laughing at us …tiny attempt of a tiny country to compete with the “big boys”.
*pleaseeeeeee…… thinking of covering myself with paper bag.

RM 400million for a NEW ISTANA NEGARA??? Will it includes a Prince William and hot hot hot gossips of a royal family??
*speechless……. Wake up la idiots. There alot of needy people need that kind of money. Besides, we dont need a grand structure as a testimony of how corrupted and stupid the government is ler.

Why am I so bitter towards my country’s government??? How can I not be la???
Frankly speaking, this is the result of years and years of bitterness silence from the younger “non-bumi” generation and I’m sure I am not alone here. Of course, I do not want to see any riots, civil wars or 13 May to happen but I ponders deeply, is it inevitable???

This Australian reporter, Michael Backman wrote this article about Malaysia, and Rafidah told The Stars papers…she is not goin to be bother by this article…stating that the reporter didnt attend the UMNO meeting bla bla :- Rafidah plays down Aussie barb.

I couldnt help but to wonder, all of them…if they just close both eyes and be ignorant, then there will be no problem???

Some politician asked us not to question the bumis’ priviledges…? I find it hard not to. We are born in Malaysia, we live here, we serve the country, we pay the taxes and all we get is a ’second citizen’ status. Actually…I dun mind what is my status, I dun mind the bumiputeras getting the priviledges…what I do mind and damn pissed about is the politicians who lead this country – ignorant, self-proclaimed superior, money-minded, hypocrites idiots. Personally, the NEP was a good program to benefit all Malaysia. Now, it’s sole purpose is to benefit the very“benefited” politicians.

Bravo!!! to certain Malaysians…

Rantrantrant_
Bravo!!! to certain Malaysians who just made Malaysia renowned again for their stupidity. Seriously, is Malaysia or the world thattttt….. boring till they have to do really really stupid thing? Ok fine, Osama bin Laden has/had become a myth. Saddam going to be hanged. US controlled Iraq. Isreal-Palestine…hmmmm bored edi, forever on-off one. Dr.M vs Pak Lah….ok, we give them a break since one got heart-attack n the other, he is ok for now.

Now, we focus on certain religion (fun!), the weaker sex(oh la la) and ice-cream!

Seriously...I just have to say something about these idiots….

Mr Dust Burnt. The infamous dude who picked the wrong battle. “Datuk ah…this is the 21st century ah, not the 18th century eventhough we know exactly which century ur mind belongs. U just dun say - It’s the Sexy Dress when ppl asked u about that peeping tom n CCTV, paham??” Simply because the whole wide world know you just CANNOT MESS WITH WOMEN AND JOURNALISTS. See what happened now? We know wat u goin to do n u did it. Saying that reporters misquoted you (yeah, reporters are dumb right, they just cant listen n write to what you were saying) and everybody asking u to apologise which u diliy daliy. Frankly speaking, I’m waiting for him to cry in a press conferance. Must be a popular thing politicians like to do now, eh.

My advice to politicians on how to avoid this situation – take a little chunk out of your fat, bloated bribes paychecks and hire urself a publicist or PR officer la. At least u can avoid making a fool out of urself cuz ur publicist will tell u this “Hey stupid, I know u are paying my bills but u r still stupid and I need my paychecks so please whatever u do, u dont make a sexist remark. Tell them that u will handle the situation professionally although I doubt it personally but hey, it will make u look good. Trust me, stupid”

**************************************************

Another bunch of idiots – the Ice-Cream gang. Look at this :-

Look at it closely cuz this may be ur last time looking at it. Did you happen to see a CROSS symbol on it? Yup, the same cross that crucifixed Jesus Christ is on this ice-cream…so claimed that bunch of idiots. Bravo!!! This just prove two things – that they have good power of observation and that they really have nothing to do. Which kind of idiots can come out with such …sorry, I dun think there is a word to define what they did. They make a police report about their “finding” and stated that it was because some consumers were unhappy.

Read this: Biskut lambang salib. PPIM buat laporan polis (it is in Malay but all it mean was that this group PPIM, an Islamic Consumer Society reported to the polis about the cross found on the ice-cream and the police cheif acknowleged it and will investigate) Erm….flabbergasted rite?

Come on, why not we(non-Muslims) prove to them that we have a good eyesight too and search for products that have a star n crescent like this :

and make a police report cuz we, the consumers are not happy with it. It caused us to stumble in our religions. Ok, fine…that was lame. But seriously, what was in their idiotic minds? Wat next?? Y not ban small letter ‘T’ in the our national language?

Seriously, u think by consuming it, a vision of Jesus will appear in front of them n ask them to convert to Christianity? U think, Muslims that consumed it will lost faith in Islam and turn to Christ? It is not them or the world that have little faith in Islam, it is YOU! You who berated your own kind and treat them like children!

(You = those idiots la, k)

*******************************************

Mr. Bollocks (bollocks = testicles in British english, buah Zakar in Malay language) ….sigh~ read this….

about allegations that Muslims getting baptised in a Catholic Church This Zakaria guy (not that cry-baby, big bully, Klang assemblyman Zakaria) had a meeting about some Muslims got baptised and the objective of the meeting was to control young people so that they would not go astray. This is a good example why they (big-shot idiots) shud hire a publicist or PR officer.

Seriously… how dumb are Christians to you? how feeble-minded are the mind of Muslims? Even if they chose to follow another religion, how bad can a RELIGION lead them? We are talking about ppl converting to another main religion in the world, not involving themselves into cults eg Black Metal or something la. Wah, u think the Catholic church will just baptise anyone at their will ah? Catholics have even more rules than Islam if a person wants to be one. I think 5x Mom’s post about this issue said it all – Let me tell you the difference about Islam/Christianity/Catholicsm/ and pengaruh barat.

Personally, these people shud open their mind (this method may work, band ur head on a table and run it under hot water…like how we open a jar of pickles) There are many underground Christians (Muslims who has converted) and there are many testimonies that Islamic authorities caught them, brainwashed them kau-kau, threatened them and yet they chose to be a Christian. What did this teach us? Not that we, Christians have magic powers and bewitched them but simply because, God (any gods actually) gives us freewill n no man can force another man to submit to their God.

Ok, fine…I dun understand Islam to comment about it, but what kind of impression these ppl are trying to show the world? I believe Islam is not a bad religion at all, but maybe there are reasons why some Muslims who been following Islamic teaching all these while, suddenly choose to sacrifice everything and leave. Maybe?

One rotten apple spoils the whole basket. When will this nonsense stops? Must we wait till it is too late to do anything right?

A Ranty Day

Rantrantrant_
I’m in a ranting mood now. YES I AM. Why am I in a ranting mood? Because…

• I just had my wisdom tooth extracted.
• Half of my face is numb. I cant even put a earphone on properly.
• Dreading the pain that will come after the anesthesia wears off. Probably in an hour or so.
• After my tooth extraction, I have to take a crowded bus to hostel. Yikes.
• Now I can feel how a goldfish in a glass bowl feels – during the operation, I have 6-7 students staring at my mouth. Me spitting bloody saliva. No more reputation. Yikes!

Another note: earlier while going to class. I was in a trolley-bus standing beside the window. There are railings on it. A gal came and put her two hands over me to hold on to the rails (like a big hug gesture). I really wanted to shout this to her: YOU.ARE.INVADING.MY.SPACE.REMOVE.UR.HANDS.AT.ONCE.OR.ELSE!

Arrghhh….yes, i know I’m makin a big fuss but I like my space. It’s my thing.

NEVER.EVER.PUT.UR.ARMS.AROUND.ME. (unless I give u permission to do so)

Murphy’s Law in Fabled-Facade

What is Murphy’s Law?

I think everybody know this popular phrase: “Whatever can go WRONG, will go WRONG” and this is exactly what been happening in this blog and to some extent, my life now.

Ok, so my itchy finger switch my blog to Blogger Beta with one dumb-ass click. N I regretted it and couldnt switch back. I delete the whole thing, start a new one. I cant just start a new one and not delete it cuz I WAN BACK MY URL. I would not forego Fabled-Facade mah.

So, I have been re-posting every posts with their date of original post. N what is happening now?

I received error everytime I republish my blog..it said 001 java.net.ConnectException: Connection refusedblog bla bla bla. What the fuck is that supposed to mean la? And they, Blogger didnt give anymore details or solutions . Ishh Ishh…

And I found out that my feeds is not working. My URL is not validate. Another headache.

And I still couldnt find a suitable way to categorize my posts.

My blog went *ka-put.

About my life right now, I feel so so DISTURBED by the acts of certain people. Some people can think that they are the smartest of all and everybody is an idiot, and worse, rule them with an iron-fist and dare to say…”I’m just a fellow student like u all, not a teacher here…so u all should be more active in bible study” Dumb ass. The only reason I duwan to say anything is cuz I duwan to make a scene in front of everybody but that person wait la… *blood boiling

What I’m goin to say, although it did not affect me directly but indirectly it really REALLy cause my blood to boil! If this is Islam thingy, I will really lost respect to it. We respect that people have a different religions but this is too much when they want to be good and uphold their religion, and affect other people’ ways of life.

In our hostel, we live by blocks with 2 or 3 rooms and toilet n bathroom. So, to go to one’s room, we have to go thru a block door and then a room door. My frens are living in a 2 room kind of block. This Arabic husband-wife living in another room. The rule in the hostel stated that a guy and a girl cannot live in the same block. This is because our hostel is occupied by mainly Malaysians aka Malays. U know la, the Malays or rather, Muslims are particular with guys-gals issue. Fine, I have no problems with that.

So why the Arab couple(the husband) can live with my frens who are girls? Cuz my frens are not Muslims. Why cant the Arab couple(the wife) live in a guys’ block? Cuz it will be dishonorable to the wife. See the irony here?? What the FUCK is this la?

At first, they seem nice and they mind their own business. Eventhou my frens’ safety are in jeopardize…come on la, he is a guy and they dont know him..what if he is a humsup kind? My frens have no problems with that.

And then slowly, they start giving more rules….rules that affect the freedom of living of my frens which is :-

- No guys should be in the block area even if for 5min. Even if my frens need to talk something like class stuff to the guys, and it is not comfortable to go to the room(maybe the other studying or sleepin) See the another irony here…the husband can be paradin naked in the block but it is allowed.

- Block door must be closed all the time. This is because the wife dun have to wear the ‘tudung’ or headscarf all the time even to go toilet. Cuz with the blockdoor open, there are chances that a guy walk pass and saw her “tudung-less”. Another irony here…

- Now, the ultimate dumb-irony here….No frens can come into the block and the room. The block door must be lock all the times. If it is urgent matter, only can sms the frens to come in but preferbly, NO FRENS CAN ENTER THE BLOCK. My frens are 20-somethings gals who have their social needs and their goddamn freedom! What the FUCK is this again? Who the FUCK are they to determine how my frens should live their live accordin to their(couple) preferances and their need to be holy? Is this holy?

One of those times in life – meeting this kind of people and just flabbergasted with them. Another bunch of holy-hypocrites!